


My Catra

by shanivoneverec



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Child Abandonment, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Mid-Canon, Past Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Post-Canon, Pre-Canon, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:41:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25889008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shanivoneverec/pseuds/shanivoneverec
Summary: Adora doesn't care what anyone says. The girl in the box is her new best friend.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 54
Kudos: 387





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a reupload from when I switched accounts. I might reupload some of my other stuff, but I'm not sure yet.
> 
> The first chapter is also based off artwork from Shadows PD on Tumblr. Here is the link to their art: https://www.google.com/amp/s/shadowspd.tumblr.com/post/620951921427136512/amp

Shadow Weaver was mad. Adora always knew when Shadow Weaver was mad, because the room would get darker, and Shadow Weaver’s voice would echo like when you yell down a deep, dark hole, and the hairs on Adora’s neck would always stand up.

Peeking her head around the door, Adora could see that Shadow Weaver’s back was facing her. On the floor at her feet was a dirty-looking box, and standing in front of her – scared and shaking – was a young cadet. Adora guessed he had brought Shadow Weaver the box.

She slid quietly around the corner, tiptoeing into the room. Adora was the only one allowed to be in these quarters. The other kids couldn’t come. But Shadow Weaver still didn’t like her sneaking around, especially when she was receiving reports. So Adora tried to be quiet, crawling under a nearby table and laying low. She smiled when she realized neither the cadet nor Shadow Weaver had sensed her.

“S-Sorry, Shadow Weaver,” the cadet stammered, “but she was crying and she’s so young…and…we didn’t want to leave her alone without food-,”

“Silence!” Shadow Weaver hissed. The cadet looked on the verge of passing out. “It appears you still cannot comprehend the necessity of following orders. I specifically told you and your fellow cadets to stay out of the scrap yard, and yet here I find out that not only have you disobeyed me, but you’ve also deigned to infest my quarters with…what, exactly? Another mouth to feed?”

“She’s just a child,” the cadet pleaded, backing away when Shadow Weaver cornered him further.

“A child I have no use for. A child Lord Hordak has no use for. And I don’t suppose you will volunteer to give your rations to her?”

The cadet lowered his head, mumbling something.

“I didn’t think so,” Shadow Weaver said, finally backing away. She turned to the box, which had begun to mewl and cry to Adora’s surprise. Adora lifted her head a bit, trying to see what was in the box, only to accidentally hit the underside of the table. The clutter on the top rattled, catching Shadow Weaver’s attention.

“Owww,” Adora whined, patting her forehead as if that would somehow help. She squeezed her eyes shut to stop the tears, not because her head hurt, but because she knew she’d been caught. She couldn’t run away now, either.

Shadow Weaver dismissed the cadet with a furious wave, then glided over to the table. She kneeled, holding out a hand to the three-year-old. Adora accepted it hesitantly, eyes wide and glossy with unshed tears.

“Adora,” Shadow Weaver cooed, “I thought we talked about you listening in on my important conversations. It’s rude, young one.” She held Adora’s hand in her own, petting it gently. Adora swallowed.

“I’m sorry, Shadow Weaver. I didn’t mean to,” she said quietly. Another mewl sounded from the box, and Adora shifted, looking past Shadow Weaver. Fear forgotten, she released her guardian’s hand and stepped closer. Shadow Weaver stopped her with a firm hand on her shoulder.

“That is none of your concern, Adora.”

“What’s in it?” she asked, pointing at the box.

“Another broken item that was left in the scrap yard,” Shadow Weaver explained, eyes narrowing. “I will be tossing it out soon. You need not be concerned,” she said, patting Adora’s head. “Why don’t you go play with the others before training?”

Adora pouted, squinting up at Shadow Weaver. She looked back towards the box, jumping slightly when a pair of furry ears peaked over the top, twitching.

“A kitty cat?!” she gasped, ripping herself out of Shadow Weaver’s hold and bounding toward the box. But upon reaching it and looking inside, Adora was awed to see that it wasn’t actually a cat in the box. Well, not really.

It had cat ears. _She_ had cat ears. And a tail. And her whole body was covered in very short and thin, but still very matted, fur. She was also naked and shivering aside from the soiled cloth of a makeshift diaper. Her eyes were different colors, and her hair was more tangled than even Adora’s was most mornings, and she cried a lot, too. Adora loved her.

Grinning her best toothy grin, Adora held out her hand to the young girl. She meowed in response, sniffed Adora’s hand once, then seemed to nuzzle against it.

“Adora –,” Shadow Weaver warned. Adora ignored her.

Almost throwing herself into the box in the process, Adora wrapped her arms around the other kid and pulled her out. She held her close, despite the fact that she smelled kind of bad and needed a shower.

“Adora, what in Etheria are you doing?” Shadow Weaver’s tone had grown harsher now, but Adora didn’t let herself be subdued. She didn’t let herself shiver or tear up. Instead, she fumbled with the girl in her arms, who was honestly almost as big as she was, and puffed out her chest, making the bestest, meanest expression she could.

“I’m keeping her. I’m gonna take care of her!”

Shadow Weaver stared down at her for a moment. Nothing moved and Adora held her breath.

“No.”

“Yes,” Adora said, stomping her foot. “I want her.”

Shadow Weaver sighed, placing a hand on her forehead. She wilted into a nearby chair and Adora felt liked she’d already won.

“Adora, listen to me,” Shadow Weaver started, “You are still very young and your training is possibly more important at this stage then it will ever be.” She looked at Adora, and though Adora obviously couldn’t see her face, save for the softening of her eyes, she could hear her entire tone change to the one she used when she wanted to reason with someone – namely, when she wanted to reason with Adora or Lord Hordak. Because Shadow Weaver demanded, usually; she didn’t reason.

“If you mean to help this child train beside you, what would that do to your training in turn?”

Adora frowned, thinking about it for a moment. Then, determined, she shook her head and turned back to Shadow Weaver.

“I can do it! We can help each other!”

“Adora, you aren’t ready for –,”

“I am ready!” Adora cried, squeezing her eyes shut again to prevent tears of frustration from leaking out. “I want her and I love her and she’s mine!”

She looked down at the girl in her arms only to find that the girl was staring up at her, too. One of her ears flicked and she sniffled, eyes wide and watery. Adora leaned her head down to nuzzle the girl in comfort, like she’d done to her hand. Then it struck Adora that the girl really needed a name. She was a cat, so something with that would probably be good.

Ado-ra.

Cat. Cat-ra?

Yes, that worked.

“She’s my Catra,” Adora whispered, smiling in glee. “This is _my Catra_!” she yelled, snuggling the girl tighter. Catra meowed, and Adora took that as her way of accepting her new name.

Shadow Weaver tensed for a second, and Adora was sure she was going to yell or discipline her, but then she almost seemed to deflate. She slumped further into the chair, tapping her nails rhythmically against its arm.

“You are a troublesome child, aren’t you?” she said fondly, almost in wonder. Adora kept her face firm. “Fine,” Shadow Weaver sighed dramatically, “it seems I’ve been overruled. But you’re responsible for her, and you’re to keep her out of my sight outside of training and daily reports.”

“Y-Yes,” Adora blinked. She knew she’d get her way, but the agreement in Shadow Weaver’s voice was still almost unreal to her. “Yes, Shadow Weaver.”

“Then,” Shadow Weaver waved her hand lazily to the door, “take her to Sergeant Cobalt. He will give you further instructions. Now leave me.”

Adora wasted no time. She stumbled to the door, Catra kicking lightly and shifting around in her arms, and spared a final glance at Shadow Weaver before hurrying away with her new best friend.


	2. Chapter 2

It quickly became clear to Adora that the nursery supervisors and cadet officers were devoted to keeping her and Catra apart. The Sergeant had told Adora that Catra seemed to be almost two years younger than the other early youth cadets, including Adora herself. This meant that Catra would need to be kept in the nursery until she could realistically join the early youth class.

Adora, stubborn child that she was, wasn’t having it.

“I’ll train her! And then she’ll be so good that she’ll get better scores than me!”

The Sergeant looked skeptical, kneeling down to properly look Adora in the eye.

“She can’t even speak or say her name. All cadets in the early youth class must be able to communicate through their lessons.”

Adora frowned, tapping her foot in thought. It was true that Catra could do little more than meow, as she did in greeting whenever Adora stopped by to visit, or in farewell if Adora had to leave. But Catra was smart – Adora had seen it. The girl could understand what Adora was saying, even if she couldn’t reciprocate during a conversation; Adora saw it in the way her eyes would light up when Adora told her the scary stories about Beast Island she’d heard from the other kids, or in the way Catra would bristle and shrink away if Adora mentioned Shadow Weaver.

And really, they spent most of their time playing anyways, so communication wasn’t really a problem for them. They didn’t need to communicate to play ‘hide from the Princesses’ or ‘the floor is quicksand’. Adora noticed that Catra liked to study her, follow her lead. Maybe Adora could show her more than just dumb games. After all, Adora was only nearing four-years-old, which was still slightly too young for the early youth class. Shadow Weaver had made an exception for her, telling the Sergeant that Adora was much smarter than the other kids – too smart to be kept in the nursery when she could start her training.

Adora was sure Catra was the same way.

“I can teach her!” Adora grinned, hopping a little in excitement. She looked at Cobalt in determination. “I’ll teach her to say her name and how to talk. And I’ll teach her all the basic commands!”

Sergeant Cobalt blinked at the girl, likely in exasperation, and then huffed, shaking his head.

“Okay, cadet,” he said, standing up. Placing his hands behind his back, he looked down at Adora callously. “When Catra passes her speech, hearing, and fitness assessments, then we’ll see about enrolling her in training. But not a moment sooner. Understood?”

“Understood!” Adora echoed, saluting him.

Adora waited until he left before making a mad dash to the nursery. She and Catra had work to do, after all.

\- - -

It was past curfew for Adora, and the nursery was dark, save for the glow of a flashlight shining beneath Catra’s blanket. The two girls were using it as a tent, the light balanced between Adora’s knees as she spoke hushed words to Catra.

“No, Catra,” Adora whispered gently, pulling Catra’s hand away from her face when she’d started to pick her nose instead of copying Adora’s motions. “Like this,” she said, placing a hand on her chest: “Adora.”

She moved her hand, poking Catra’s chest as lightly as possible, as she had learned the hard way that Catra liked to initiate touches, but didn’t like to receive them. “Catra.”

Catra’s ear flicked and she growled a little bit at the finger poking her chest. Adora removed it quickly, smiling at Catra in encouragement. Catra watched the hand leave, cocking her head curiously as she looked back up at Adora.

“Do you get it yet?”

Catra continued to blink at Adora, sniffling once.

Adora frowned and scooted closer, taking Catra’s hand in her own. Catra jumped, though she didn’t attempt to pull her hand away.

“I’m Adora,” Adora said, moving Catra’s hand so that her finger was touching Adora’s forehead. Maybe that was less personal than the chest. Catra had a habit of curling up to protect her heart and belly.

“And you’re Catra,” she said, gently turning Catra’s hand so that she was poking her own head instead. She continued to press Catra’s hand into her forehead, laughing alongside her as Catra started giggling and grasping at Adora’s wrist. Tugging her own arm free, Catra crawled even closer to Adora and poked her in the forehead, which only made her break out into louder giggles.

Both girls jerked apart when the echo of marching boots could be heard in the hallway, heading in the direction of the nursery. Adora quickly switched off the flashlight and flattened herself as best she could under the blanket.

“Who’s laughing in here?” one of the officers demanded, switching on the light. Catra hissed as they flickered on, sitting up in bed so that she could properly glare at the officer.

Adora bit her lip and tried her best to hold her breath. She heard the officer make a noise of contempt.

“Go to sleep, brat. It’s past your curfew.” Adora resisted the urge to make herself known and yell at him for calling Catra a “brat”. Before long, though, the lights flickered back off and the sound of the commander’s boots disappeared down the hallway. Adora exhaled in relief, tossing the blanket off of herself.

“Okay, I’d better go,” she frowned at Catra, her legs dangling over the bed.

Catra looked devastated, like she did every time Adora left, and crawled over to dangle her own legs off the bed, too. She turned to Adora, waiting for Adora to look at her in return, and then poked Adora’s forehead again and giggled softly.

Adora smiled and squeezed Catra’s shoulder, then heaved herself off the bed. She grabbed the flashlight and her shoes quickly, deciding to sneak back to her room barefoot rather than waste any more time putting the shoes on.

“See you tomorrow, Catra,” she whispered, creeping towards the door. She pressed herself against the door, peering outside and looking down both ends of the hallway. She listened carefully for the sound of anyone patrolling nearby.

Hearing nothing but silence, Adora prepared to leave. She was stopped in her tracks as Catra cried out from her bed.

“Adora!”

Adora felt the heat rise to her face and she turned to look at Catra. The girl was sitting at the edge of her bed, gripping the sheets so tightly Adora was sure her claws would tear holes in them.

“Adora,” she whimpered again, ears flattening.

Adora’s expression of shock melted into an open-mouthed smile. She laughed in excitement as she ran back to Catra, not caring in the least if anyone outside heard her laughter or caught her hugging her best friend.

Adora held Catra close, nodding happily as the girl sniffled against her.

“That’s right, Catra!” she said, feeling her eyes grow wet. “Adora. I’m _your_ Adora.”


	3. Chapter 3

It hadn’t been an easy climb, but Catra had managed to excel in her training to the point where she could be classified as a pre-junior cadet alongside Adora and the others, even in spite of the small age gap. This was due in no small part to Adora’s constant motivation and support. And just like Adora had theorized, Catra was incredibly smart and a fast learner. And she had something to fight for, something to prove. Namely, she needed to excel so that she could be with Adora.

At thirteen, Catra was sparring with Adora and the other fourteen-year-olds and was making top scores across the board. Granted, her scores rarely topped Adora’s, but Catra let it slide. She told herself she didn’t mind being second best, that she was lucky to be with her Adora anyways – training with her, eating with her, and best of all, finally sleeping in the same barracks together.

They’d even slept in the same bed at first, that is, until one of the other cadets told on them. Afterwards, Catra had resigned herself to staying on the top bunk because at the very least she was up high, and therefore had a better scope of her surroundings. But in reality, she was only watching Adora, leaning so far over her own mattress that she almost crashed to the floor several times, and always to catch a peek of Adora down below.

That didn’t last long. Eventually both of them would disregard the warnings and threats. They’d crawl in bed together when everyone else was already asleep. They’d pull the sheets over their heads like they did when they were younger, and sometimes one of them would switch on the flashlight between the two of them, illuminating their toothy grins and blushes of happiness. Sometimes they wouldn’t use the flashlight. They’d whisper to each other in the dark, giggling at the nearby sounds of snoring, clutching at the blankets and resisting the urge to cuddle up closer.

At thirteen things were steady. The other cadets stopped caring if Catra and Adora shared a bed. Lonnie caught them one day and simply rolled her eyes.

“If Shadow Weaver finds out, I was never here,” she said, leaving to take her morning shower. Catra smirked as she left. They rarely got along, and Catra suspected Lonnie was almost just as fond of Adora as Catra herself was. It was selfish, she knew, but she enjoyed having Adora as her best friend and being Adora’s best friend in turn. It was almost like they belonged to each other, she sometimes thought. But then she’d quickly shake the thought out of her head before Adora caught sight of her burning face.

“You know, she’s right,” Adora yawned, nudging Catra with her elbow. “If we don’t get out there soon, Shadow Weaver will probably come looking for us.”

“Let her look,” Catra scoffed, folding her arms across her chest. If she hadn’t loved sleep so much she would have hated it, if only because it took up most of the time she had alone with Adora. “It’s not fair that she probably gets to sleep in and eat as much of the rations as she wants. And I’m pretty sure all she does is drink in her quarters before coming down to yell at m- _us_.”

Adora gave Catra a sympathetic smile, tugging gently on her tail as a subtle means of coaxing her. But Catra ignored her, and Adora sighed. Any mention of Shadow Weaver around Catra tends to spark her ire.

“I mean, why’d Lord Hordak put _her_ in charge?” Catra asked, perhaps a little too loudly, throwing her hands in the air. “I bet I could do her job a thousand times better than she could!”

Adora had half a mind to calm Catra down and forcibly pull her out of bed, especially if she was going to talk about things that might get her in trouble later. But instead she smirked, leaning over Catra to regard her.

“I thought you didn’t care about things like that?”

“I mean…I don’t, obviously,” Catra huffed, looking off to the side. But then she smiled as she remembered their past conversations. Her eyes met Adora’s again, dreamy and filled with warmth. “But when you take over this place, I’m the only one who can be your second-in-command. And we’ll be junior cadets soon, so it’s time to get serious, as you _always_ say,” she said the last part with a groan, though her grin gave her away.

“Careful,” Adora said, grabbing her hand and tugging her off the bed and onto her feet. Catra made another noise of annoyance, but went without resisting. “It’s starting to sound like you _like_ me.”

Catra’s breath caught and Adora, as usual, pressed her palm to her mouth to suppress her snickering. One of the other cadets had teased them before about “liking” each other. Catra was still young and somewhat of a novice to the idea of “dating,” especially seeing as it wasn’t something you did openly in the Horde, but she had known by the look on the cadet’s face what he was getting at. Adora had been forced to restrain her before she could scratch that stupid smirk off his stupid face.

Except now Adora saw fit to weaponize the teasing against Catra. Apparently Catra had looked hurt by it once, and Adora had quickly apologized and promised to stop, but Catra had brushed it aside. She played along with it, told Adora it didn’t matter what other people thought of them. She decided for the both of them that they’d own it, make it their own thing.

The only problem was it still caught her off guard, but she didn’t have the courage yet to admit that the reason it caught her off guard was because…because maybe it was a _little_ true. At least on her side of things.

“Hey,” Adora said, waving a hand in front of Catra’s face and looking concerned. “Don’t space out on me. I need you to have my back during our assessment.”

Catra blinked, shaking her head as she came back to reality. Adora’s brow was furrowed but she was still smiling softly. She placed an arm around Catra’s shoulder, gesturing to the door.

“So, together then?”

Catra blinked again, face flushed as Adora pulled her in close. She swallowed, quickly peeling Adora’s arm off of her and taking off towards the door. Her face felt hot and she wanted to splash some cold water on it before the assessment. And the good news was their showers only had cold water.

But honestly, the last thing she needed was Lonnie teasing her, or Kyle making some weird, oblivious comment, or Rogelio…just being Rogelio.

She paused in the doorway, smirking over her shoulder at Adora.

“Oh please, I’m going to kick your butt today.”

They raced to the showers, and then to the mess hall afterwards for breakfast rations. It was a tie both times.

\- - -

She’d been doing well. She’d caught Adora off guard twice during the assessment. The first time Adora had actually had the upper hand; Catra was the most agile without a doubt, but Adora’s hits always had just a bit more power behind them. Though Catra had been successfully dodging and ducking for every one of Adora’s swings, there was a moment where her chest piece had been completely exposed, which she knew was a careless mistake on her part, but she couldn’t help but use the opportunity to play with Adora a little. She could see Adora ready her staff to strike, but then the arm dropped as Catra placed her pointer finger to Adora’s forehead – mimicking what Adora had taught her years ago to get each other’s attention, back before Catra had learned to talk.

Catra had laughed at the frown she received, but less than a second later Adora was smiling at her again. She never could resist Catra’s laugh. As they got back into combat mode, Catra saw her second chance to throw Adora off guard.

“Owwww,” she wailed, landing on her side as Adora flipped her hard. It had hurt a little, but Catra had plenty of practice resisting crying out through pain. Honestly, Adora should have seen this coming.

“You okay?” Adora asked breathlessly, kneeling next to Catra to inspect the damage.

Catra saw her moment. She swept her staff under Adora’s feet, causing Adora to fall onto her back completely defenseless. Perfect.

Catra struck, but Adora rolled out of the way. And then their staves met once more, sparking and hissing, as they struggled and smirked at each other. Neither was losing steam, neither ready to surrender, and Catra smiled with the knowledge that they were truly well matched.

That is, until Catra saw the mischievous glint in Adora’s eye and felt a presence behind her. Lonnie was positioned above her, and Catra had to divert her attention as the other girl’s staff came down hard. She didn’t want to lose to Lonnie, but Catra could feel herself losing her footing. She hadn’t expected Lonnie to step in and help Adora, but perhaps she should have. Another error on her part.

Catra fell to her knees under the pressure, but she was still far more agile than Lonnie. She pushed upwards, throwing both herself and Lonnie into a backflip, and as Lonnie landed behind her, Catra turned and saw her opening. She struck Lonnie’s chest piece, disqualifying her from the round.

She didn’t know why she paused. Adora was still in the round, after all. But Catra stared at Lonnie in a mixture of defiance and indignation, panting heavily. Maybe she was also a little hurt. Everyone was supposed to be against everyone during these assessments. And if anyone should have been a team, it was her and Adora.

Speaking of which, Adora took those moments of Catra stewing in her anger to come up behind her. She easily disarmed Catra, hitting her chest piece and disqualifying her as well.

“And there’s our winner,” Sergeant Cobalt announced.

Close. She’d been so close. Second place was fine, she decided again to herself. Adora was happy, and that’s all that mattered. Adora’s victory would be reported to Lord Hordak and then they’d be one step closer to leaving this prison together.

Adora checked on her afterwards.

“Hey! You were awesome!” she exclaimed, gripping Catra’s shoulder before Catra could use her claws to tear into Lonnie. “Did I hurt you?” she asked tenderly, and Catra couldn’t bear it for some reason. She shrugged Adora off like she always did when vulnerability wasn’t an option, when they weren’t completely alone.

“No, I’m fine!” she said too quickly. “You’re just lucky I let you win.”  
\- - -

Catra cried alone in the locker room. She would have stayed in there the rest of the day if she could, but someone would have found her eventually, whether it be Adora, one of the other cadets, or worst of all, Shadow Weaver. And if Shadow Weaver found her crying, she’d likely make her cry harder.

Catra had grown good at suppressing her tears.

But today was just one last water droplet in a cup about to spill over. And so everything spilled over as she clutched the sink and glared at her weakness in the mirror.

It wasn’t about being in second place. It wasn’t about being behind Adora. It was that Catra would never be an equal to Adora, not in the eyes of the others. And if she wasn’t Adora’s equal, then what was she to her? If she was as low as they said she was, then what was stopping Adora from tossing her aside, too?

Catra was tired.  
Catra had too much to prove to too many people. 

“If you fall behind, you’re only jeopardizing Adora’s training,” Shadow Weaver had warned her once. “And if Adora’s progress falls short, I may be forced to remove certain _distractions_.”

She was tired of hearing it. She was tired of being the younger cadet, the one who had to work extra hard just to train with Adora. She hadn’t asked to be brought there. She hadn’t asked Shadow Weaver to keep her, but Adora had.

And sometimes, deep down, Catra wished she hadn’t bothered.

\- - -

They trained again after their allotted rest and recuperation. This wasn’t an assessment, but the Sergeant constantly got onto them about keeping their reflexes sharp. There was no room to breathe after a test, only more room to improve.

Catra wasn’t feeling it. Her stomach was nagging at her, and she had the slightest hint of a headache after crying.

She concealed it as best she could, but she knew she was failing. Her eyes still felt a little weepy and her chest ached. All she really wanted was to crawl back under the covers in the barracks and groom herself, perhaps never come back out. 

The thing that bothered her most was that Adora, her caring, attentive Adora, didn’t seem to notice anything was off. And while that was her intention, a part of her felt as though she was still screaming internally.

_I’m not okay! Please recognize that I need you!_

Catra grunted as she thrust her staff against Adora’s, mustering as much strength as she could despite that kind of thing being Adora’s strong suit. Luckily for her, Adora was slightly disoriented after just barely dodging one of Lonnie’s hits; she’d vaulted over her shoulders, landing with a somersault before successfully striking Lonnie out of the game. And Catra would have been proud if she wasn’t so determined.

Catra growled, swiping her foot beneath them to purposefully make Adora stumble. Adora fell back against the floor, gasping as Catra pinned Adora’s arms to her side, leaning closer in a rather intimate gesture.

They stared at each other, Catra panting harshly and Adora almost looking stunned. Catra swallowed a sob, forced back the tears she could feel hiding behind her glower. And then she saw a flash of something in Adora’s expression – some sort of recognition. Adora smiled, pulling her arm loose from Catra’s grasp, and Catra let it go willingly.

Adora’s pointer finger pressed against her forehead, and Catra almost laughed. Of course she would.

But unlike Catra, Adora didn’t let the touch linger, and Catra yelped as she was suddenly thrown back with the impact of Adora’s staff colliding with her chest piece.

The buzzing made her cringe, as did the impact of her head hitting the floor. She was almost stupefied, laying there after Adora knocked her out – after Adora used their thing against her. Catra had at least given her a moment to come back to her senses, but Adora hadn’t shown her the same courtesy. She shouldn’t care. She didn’t care.

She didn’t want to cry in front of them.

“Well done, cadet,” Catra heard Sergeant Cobalt say. She didn’t look up. Didn’t turn to acknowledge the others as they laughed and congratulated Adora from the sidelines. She lay there, arms spread on the training mat, staring up at the pipes and cracks in the walls – stretching further and further up toward the ceiling, disappearing in darkness.

She was vaguely aware that Adora was speaking to her, but she could only barely hear her through the roaring in her ears. Tears had begun to leak from her eyes, and Catra sensed a note of panic in Adora’s muffled words.

Slapping away the hand outstretched to her, Catra stumbled to her feet and ran. She ignored those who called after her.

\- - -

She couldn’t bring herself to eat with Adora that evening. She didn’t go to the mess hall. Instead, Catra took a familiar risk and snuck into one of the warehouses closer to the edge of the Fright Zone.

She’d been doing this for awhile now. She had tried to convince Adora to come with her, but Adora was always too chicken to break the rules. Catra wasn’t though, and Adora had no idea what she was missing. The Horde had so much contraband, so much food – real food – that they didn’t share with anyone else. It was pretty messed up, forcing all their soldiers to eat the same brown and gray bars when they could be eating _applesauce_ instead.

After dragging one of the crates into her own little makeshift corner, Catra clawed open a tin of applesauce and happily dug her fingers into the sweet goop. She ate like an animal, mewling happily and eagerly shoving any thoughts of Adora or everything that happened that day to the back of her mind.

She was on her third tin when the loading gate opened, startling her. She dropped the tin immediately, ducking lower to the ground and squeezing herself between two of the boxes. She didn’t think she’d be caught, as they hardly ever wandered over here, but Catra had learned the value of a good hiding place during her time with the Horde.

A cargo porter drove in, and luckily only a couple of soldiers exited the vehicle. Less to deal with, less to hide from.

Catra listened closely as they unloaded several large boxes from the back.

“Isn’t this kind of a waste?” one of them asked, legs trembling with the strain of holding the box. “I mean,” he huffed, lowering it to the floor, “…it’s still weapons and armor.”

“ _Old_ weapons and armor,” the other guy clarified. “Old weapons and armor that can be melted down to make new weapons and armor. You really think this junk is going to protect anyone from those princesses?”

Catra’s ears perked up at that. Weapons and armor? The most they usually had to practice with were their staves.

“Okay, wise guy,” the other replied. “Except we’re literally leaving these in the warehouse to collect dust. And I’ll bet it’s going to stay that way, too. Who knows what other abandoned things are in here?”

Catra’s eyes narrowed as they finished unloading the boxes, but she didn’t dare creep out until the loading gate was shut and the sound of rumbling had become too distant to recognize. Finally, after sniffing the air a couple times to make sure she was actually alone, Catra slowly inched over to the fresh pile of junk.

She realized that one guy hadn’t been lying as she started to dig and sort through the stuff. This really was useless junk. Most of it was clearly just thrown out after being damaged in past battles or missions. Most of the armor had really bad dents and cracks in it. Completely unsalvageable. The weapons weren’t all that impressive either: a few rusted blades here, a few broken and busted shock batons there. And Catra had her claws, which were more treacherous than anything in these boxes.

Sighing in disappointment, she was about to throw everything back in the box she’d almost emptied when something else caught her eye.

It was lodged in the bottom of the box, hiding under a tacky red breastplate that she wasn’t really fond of. But _this_.

She held the mask up to her face, studied it. It was metal, cold and a striking red – more attractive than the matching breast plate, and more her style. The black slots at the top almost resembled cat eyes to her, and she smiled and squinted back them comically. She admired its sleek edges, the pointy tips, and the overall weight of the mask. It was heavy and reliable, the perfect protection.

Setting it on her lap, Catra frowned and gently pressed her finger up to her forehead. She let it rest there, just for a second, before choking back a sob and removing it again. She didn’t want to feel like this again. She didn’t want to blame Adora for her own insecurities, for her own inability to protect herself. That’s why Adora always came to her protection.

Maybe it didn’t always have to be like that. A hopeful thought, but she had many of those these days in spite of her sadness. She wanted to be Adora’s equal. She wanted to protect her, and she would. 

Catra lifted the mask to her face, successfully covering her forehead. She felt the cold metal dig into her fur, and she smiled.

\- - -

“Catra?” Adora whispered, climbing up to the top bunk. Everyone was already asleep, and for awhile she’d waited there on her own bunk, eager to check on Catra and make sure she was okay. What worried Adora was that Catra hadn’t greeted her, or anyone else for that matter, when they all finally entered the barracks that night. She’d already been there, resting atop her own mattress, but the only reason Adora knew that was because the lump hiding underneath the blanket was clearly breathing.

She hadn’t seen Catra’s face. She didn’t even know if she was awake. She didn’t care. Adora, who had been paranoid with guilt since that evening, desperately needed to talk to her.

“Catra?” she tried again. “Are you awake?” She pressed a hand against what she guessed was Catra’s shoulder. A tail slithered out from under the blanket and caressed that hand, and Adora smiled softly.

“Hey Adora,” Catra greeted somewhat somberly, her voice muffled by the blanket.

“Why are you hiding from me?” Adora teased gently. “Can you come out? I…uh…I think we need to talk.”

Catra shifted for a second, and Adora waited patiently beside her. She rubbed at her shoulder, taking the softer approach. Sure, Adora didn’t shy away from confrontation, but with Catra she’d learned to compromise – ease into discussions. She could have ripped the blanket away, but that would have done more harm than good.

“Don’t make me come under there with you,” she said when Catra still didn’t show herself.

Adora heard Catra sigh, and then she finally tossed the blanket aside. She sat cross-legged in front of Adora, ears flattened. She didn’t meet her eyes. And she was wearing something on her face now.

“A mask?” Adora asked, brow furrowed. “Catra, where’d you get a mask?”

“Does it matter?” Catra asked, crossing her arms.

“I mean…no? But…” Adora frowned. She sighed irritably, shaking her head. “Nevermind. Why were you so upset earlier?” She placed a hand on Catra’s chin, lifting it so she could look into her eyes. Adora looked completely stricken. “Did I do something wrong?”

Catra grabbed Adora’s wrist firmly, pulling her hand away. She glanced off to the side, shaking her head.

“No.”

Adora stared at her for a bit, willing Catra to look at her in return. Catra refused. Finally Adora’s nose wrinkled and she took a deep breath, exhaling into her hands. Catra relented then, watching in discomfort as Adora slowly dragged her palms down her face. Then she dropped them back into her lap, and an amused smile spread across her face.

“You’re not going to tell me what’s up, are you?”

“…No,” Catra answered after a short pause.

“Fine. Well, that mask doesn’t suit you,” she joked quietly. “It’s too big for your face.”

“Is not!” Catra exclaimed, the fur on her tail sticking up. She jumped as she heard a particularly loud snore, and covered her mouth with both hands. “Is not,” she repeated in a whisper.

“Why are you wearing it?” Adora asked curiously.

Catra frowned, feeling her face grow hot. Not in an embarrassed way, either. She needed to cry again.

“Catra?” Adora pressed, reaching out to her. Catra scooted backwards on the bed, trying to get away. She shook her head, trying not to make it too apparent that her breath had begun to catch over and over. Too late.

Adora’s expression morphed into one of barely subdued anguish, and Catra wondered if Adora knew that expression broke her heart.

“Oh, Catra,” she whispered, taking her hand back. She cradled it against her chest, staring down at Catra’s hands as they quivered in her lap.

“F-For protection,” Catra managed before the tears came out in full force. She hiccupped, bringing her knees to her chest and burying her face in them.

Adora’s breath caught, and Catra wasn’t sure if it was in understanding or because of Catra’s rather public breakdown.

“Catra,” she whispered, “…come here?”

Catra shook her head as she continued to sob quietly into her knees. She tensed as the blanket she was sitting on was forcibly pulled out from underneath her, and then suddenly there was a blanket on top of her and Adora. They were protected by the darkness. The other cadets couldn’t see them now, couldn’t hear them, even if they were to wake up. And that was probably still a lie, but Catra repeated it to herself as a means of comfort.

And then Catra was being held by Adora, which was a huge no-no for future Horde soldiers. She didn’t care one bit. She wished they were actually alone, because she desperately wanted to just bury herself in the crook of Adora’s neck and wail until she passed out. Adora stroke Catra’s hair, hushing her gently and whispering any words of comfort she could manage.

“I’m sorry,” she said, voice cracking. She kissed the metal that covered Catra’s forehead, and Catra realized she understood. “If you want to shield yourself from everyone and everything, then I won’t stop you.” Her voice wavered a little, “But you don’t have to shield yourself from me. Don’t place a barrier between us.” She tugged at Catra’s shoulders, moving her so she could meet her eyes again. Catra’s eyes widened at how glassy Adora’s were, though she remained strong. Catra knew Adora simply didn’t want to cry while Catra was letting everything out.

“No matter what anyone else says, we…” she paused, chewing on her bottom lip, “…we belong together.”

Adora’s blush extended all the way to the tips of her ears. Catra might’ve found it funny under different circumstances, but she was past the teasing. Not tonight.

She pulled Adora close again, resting her chin on Adora’s shoulder. Adora started rubbing her back, giggling with a small sniffle as Catra started purring.

“My Catra,” Adora whispered.

“Yours,” Catra whispered back.


	4. Chapter 4

Adora slept in Catra’s cot almost the entire time they were in space. Sparkles and Arrow Boy said nothing, and while Catra couldn’t yet claim to know them very well, she suspected they didn’t mind being left to their own devices. Based on what little information Adora had leaked to her, they were more than happy to have some alone time. But she also _really_ didn’t want to think about what they could be doing back in the bunkroom.

It had been awkward the first night it happened, but they had also taken steps to crossing that chasm that had grown between them for the last three years. This mostly consisted of them staring at each other in awkward silence, absorbing the feeling of just being around each other again. And then Catra had brushed her tail against Adora’s leg, and Adora had pulled her closer, and all the stormy thoughts in Catra’s mind had dissipated, leaving an ember of warmth flickering inside her heart.

And Catra had been somewhat satisfied come morning, if not still a little wounded and vulnerable, festering in thoughts of self-loathing and uncertainty despite knowing it wasn’t healthy or productive to do so. And Adora wouldn’t want it.

She hadn’t expected Adora to come back the next night, this time not asking permission, but rather simply shuffling awkwardly through the door, cocking her head with a small, silly sort of smile at Catra. And Catra had nodded and the two of them had cuddled up close almost immediately, their arms just barely brushing. They’d spoken more that night, too, and not about regret or forgiveness either. They’d spoken about how dinner hadn’t settled right with either of them (maybe making Glimmer the exclusive cook wasn’t the best idea), how space could be beautiful at times, though both of them still longed to rest their feet on a planet’s soil again, how teaching a clone how to play cards was a ridiculously difficult undertaking…

From then on, they spoke often. Catra was delighted that she was no longer shy to do so. She was astounded, still a little guilty maybe, but delighted all the same.

And then the roughhousing returned. And the laughter. And the secret smiles that had felt so forbidden back when they were cadets in the Horde.

“You destroyed it!” Adora yelped, shoving Catra aside with her shoulder and staring forlornly down at the dough she’d left to rise. Instead of rising, it had collapsed in on itself, becoming a pile of off-white mush. “I told you not to knead it that much,” she glared half-heartedly at Catra, who merely crossed her arms and stared at the dough in disappointment, as if it had actively chosen to defy them.

“Hey, I’m sorry. But you know kneading’s kind of my thing and once I started…” her ears flattened just the slightest bit. “It was really relaxing, okay? I couldn’t help it!”

Adora rolled her eyes and took the dough in her hands, inspecting it as if seeing if she could salvage the shape or perform some magic on it to make it rise. Catra smirked as Adora’s nose wrinkled, eyes widening in realization.

“It smells like apples,” she said, turning to Catra in shock. “Did you put…sparkling apple cider in here?”

“I thought it could use a kick,” Catra shrugged. She had to bite her lip to suppress her snickering as Adora’s eye twitched. “What? Apples are good. It can’t be worse than the stuff Sparkles was experimenting with.”

They continued to look at each other as Adora dropped the flattened lump back in its pan. Then Adora closed her eyes, taking a steadying breath. She chuckled on the exhale, a self-deprecating smile spreading across her face.

“I guess us volunteering to make dinner tonight was a mistake, huh?”

“Hey, speak for yourself,” Catra objected, shoving at Adora’s shoulder. “My idea was brilliant. You’re the one who thought to ground dehydrated potato shreds into flour.”

“Oh, so it’s my fault?” Adora challenged without any actual bite. Another playful shove.

“Obviously! Who even wants to eat potato shreds? Doesn’t that crap go in the trash?”

Before long they were knocking pans over with their scuffling, hands locked together as they pushed against one another, both of them laughing and panting. Catra squealed as Adora used brunt of her strength to knock her off balance, then swiped a foot underneath to send them both tumbling to the ground. They rolled a couple times, both silently amused at the fact that even as friends they couldn’t let the other win, until Catra finally ended up on top. She slammed Adora’s hands to the floor with emphasis, threading their fingers together. Her smirk of victory was undoubtedly watered down by her incessant panting, but in her defense, she was still regaining her strength. In many ways, they both were.

“I can still kick your butt,” Catra said in wonder.

“And destroy half the kitchen in the process,” Adora pointed out, glancing regretfully at the mess they’d made. “To be fair, I think that was a tie.”

“Nah, I don’t think so,” Catra chuckled, leaning forward almost subconsciously so that their noses almost brushed. Adora’s breath caught, her eyes fluttered a bit, and then Catra felt herself fall a little deeper as Adora seemed to remember herself and met Catra’s inane grin with one of her own. Catra wondered how long they might have stayed like that if Bow hadn’t chosen that exact moment to come in.

He scanned over the toppled bowls and the abandoned pile of flour that slumped miserably in the corner, then turned to acknowledge Adora and Catra, neither of whom had the sense to come apart or even get off the floor.

“So, uh…I guess it’s leftovers tonight?”

\- - -

They shared a bed again that night.

It felt different. Not bad, just a little different. Or maybe that was just Catra’s stomach crying out for real food. She briefly weighed what she would sacrifice for a simple tin of applesauce. Perhaps Arrow Boy’s prized bow? That seemed like a fair trade.

It might also have been because Adora was touching her. A lot. Which wouldn’t have been unusual in the past, and wasn’t unusual in the “daytime” so much – not that there actually was a daytime out here, but whatever. They had wrestled earlier that day, after all, and sometimes Catra would come up behind Adora while she was distracted and just kind of throw all her weight onto Adora’s shoulders, letting her arms wrap loosely around her neck. Sometimes Adora would place a hand on Catra’s shoulder or even take Catra’s hand in hers and squeeze it reassuringly. And, of course, they had fallen asleep against each other. Multiple times. It was almost ritualistic for them.

But this was different. Adora didn’t usually touch Catra’s hair without Catra’s permission, but she was tonight. And Catra was letting her, enjoying the feeling of Adora’s fingers threading through the choppy locks, scratching lightly at her scalp. She’d started purring and Adora hadn’t even teased her about it – which was also unusual.

Adora hardly ever let her gaze wander while they spoke, but she did tonight, biting her lip thoughtfully as her eyes traveled over the different parts of Catra’s face. And it was making it damned hard for Catra to focus on their conversation; typically they maintained eye contact, as admiring each other in any other way made them both feel too…exposed. Catra usually didn’t like Adora admiring her hair, or counting her freckles, or studying her mouth. But tonight she really didn’t mind.

And lastly, Adora didn’t playfully fidget or fool around, even while cuddling. All touches had a purpose, all significant or sentimental. But tonight she was playing with Catra’s hand, trailing her fingers lightly over the knuckles, tracing the lines on Catra’s palm, and threading their fingers together over and over again. Feeling awkward and a little uncertain, Catra let her tail trail up Adora’s leg, tickling her softly. Adora snorted, but the touches didn’t cease. In fact, Adora scooted closer, and Catra felt a very cold foot press against her shin.

“Um, how dare you?” Catra mockingly glowered. “Get your cold feet off of me,” she laughed, kicking Adora gently under the blanket.

“But you’re so warm,” Adora cackled, the blanket billowing between them with each kick. Catra pushed against her, scooting backwards on the cot until she almost fell off. But Adora was quicker, wrapping her arms securely around Catra’s waist and tugging her back to the center of the mattress. “Okay, okay,” she laughed. “I’ll stop. I promise.”

“You’re being really annoying tonight,” Catra teased, feeling her chest ache at the fact that she could again. “I should kick you out, make you sleep back in the bunkroom with all the heavy breathing and mouth noises, or whatever’s going on in there.”

“You wouldn’t,” Adora said with confidence. “And besides, maybe we’re being too hard on them. Maybe it isn’t like that,” she shrugged.

“Please,” Catra rolled her eyes. “You’ve seen the way they look at each other. The heart eyes. The pining.” She swallowed, glancing down as Adora’s fingers started to trace the stripes on her forearm. “It’s disgusting.”

“I think it’s kind of cute, but…yeah…”

“That’s why you were so desperate to escape it, right? That’s why you’re sleeping in here with me?”

“Maybe I just like to be around you,” Adora said, smirking up at Catra. Meanwhile Catra was actively resisting the will to blush, and failing miserably if the heat in her face was anything to go by.

Seeing Catra blush apparently made Adora realize what she’d said, and suddenly she was blushing, too, tripping over her words as she tried to find the most gracious way to backtrack. This was becoming too much like old times.

“I mean…you’re right, though. I’d…um…I-I’d definitely rather be in here than listen to…”

“Careful. It’s starting to sound like _you_ like _me_ , now.”

Adora’s eyes weren’t meeting hers; instead, they followed the fingers that continued to trail up and down Catra’s arm. It was almost comforting the way Adora caressed her, counting each stripe and making small circles in the thin fur.

“You know I do,” Adora said, like it was just that simple. “That was never a question.”

“I have no idea why, though,” Catra snorted, rolling her eyes in an effort to play it casual. Like hearing those words didn’t make her heart stutter. Like the answer didn’t mean the universe to her.

“Because…” Adora trailed off, biting her lip again as her cheeks flushed. Catra watched in silent awe. “I mean, I said it before. It’s because…you’re Catra. You’re _my_ Catra.”

Eyes feeling suspiciously wet, Catra blinked at Adora, watched as she seemed to deflate into the blanket, as if saying those words had sapped her of energy. The fingers stopped their dancing, settling on Catra’s arm instead, gripping it like Adora used to when they were children. Keeping her close.

“I…” Catra swallowed, nearly choking with the effort of speaking. “I shouldn’t…”

She was grateful when Adora scooted forward, resting her forehead against Catra’s and effectively silencing her. She didn’t know how to finish that thought.

“Don’t,” Adora commanded. “I know what you want to say and…I want you here. We all do, but I do especially. You don’t know how hard it was to see you like that…you don’t know…”

She was breaking down. Catra could hear it in her voice, in the way it cracked. She didn’t stop her, though she wanted to.

“We’re together and we’re both going to be better. Okay?” A tear fell, and then a couple more followed it. Catra nuzzled them away.

“Okay,” she agreed softly, closing her eyes.

Adora sighed and sniffled once, and Catra felt affection swell within her. She loved her so much.

And for awhile they left the conversation there, foreheads resting against each other, closer than they’d been in seemingly forever. Catra suspected they’d fall asleep just like that, but then Adora shifted, ran her fingers through Catra’s hair again, and Catra started to purr once more.

“You want me?” she whispered, knowing her voice was fraught with disbelief. She needed to hear it again. “You…want me to stay?”

Adora sighed, pulling away so their eyes could meet.

“I want you,” she said after a pause, chewing on her bottom lip again. Catra loved and hated when she did that. Her brow furrowed, and Catra understood the next word was still just an offer, though it sounded like a command. “Stay.” Her choice.

Catra’s breath hitched and she nodded. They smiled at each other, ignoring how close they were and how nearly unbearable and dangerous it was. And when Adora’s eyes began to travel downwards again, down to her lips, Catra didn’t question it. Nor did she question it when Adora’s mouth pressed firmly against her own.

Instead, Catra decided to lose herself to it, as if it were nothing more than a daydream. Her hands lifted, cupping Adora’s cheeks, thumbs stroking her jawline with as much tenderness as Catra could muster. Adora sighed, sounding happy to Catra, perhaps even relieved, and they parted for a moment before Catra, needy and drunk off various emotions, pulled her close again.

It wasn’t an exceptionally deep kiss, nor did it last very long. Adora pulled away for good before Catra could truly let go and give into all of her repressed feelings of longing, and maybe that was for the best. Adora’s hand clutched Catra’s arm, frozen there as if uncertain what to do with itself. Catra’s own hands fell from Adora’s face down to her shoulders, clutching them tightly as she regained control of her senses. 

When they finally found the courage to look at each other, neither looked as shock as the other expected. In fact, they both looked almost stupidly happy – content, even.

“I’m sorry,” Adora breathed anyways. “I’m not…sure where that came from.”

To Catra’s surprise, their foreheads met once more. The closeness was intoxicating.

“I…” Catra trailed off with a breathless laugh. “I guess you do really like me, then.”

“I do,” Adora laughed, shoving playfully at Catra’s shoulders. Her breath glided across Catra’s face, cooling the burning heat that lingered there. Catra wanted to kiss her again. “Is…that okay?”

“Yeah,” Catra said, nodding. They stared at each other in the dark, smiling softly. Though they trembled, neither had any thought to reach down and grab the blanket, which was hanging mostly off the bed and clung to Catra’s foot for dear life. “Yeah, that’s okay.”

The words she wanted to say most lingered on her tongue: those three words that would change everything. But she kept them close to her heart, refused to reveal them. Adora looked timid, nervous, and it made Catra want to open her soul to the other girl, if only to reassure Adora that Catra _did_ want this, that she didn’t blame Adora for anything, that she never would hurt Adora like that again, and that as long as Adora wanted and needed her there, Catra would follow. Catra would be better. They both would.

And yet, their relationship was still fragile. And Catra knew she wasn’t ready to say those words. And, in the back of her mind, she also believed Adora might not be ready to hear them.

They wouldn’t question it for now. There was no time to do so.

Instead, they slept in their usual embrace to the constant humming of Darla’s engines.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I'm testing the canon waters a bit with this, but there is a part of me that believes the Heart might not have been their first kiss. I could go further into it, but I'm not going to. I'm also cool with the idea that it was their first kiss, but I thought I'd experiment.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Changed this chapter to present tense, mostly because I'm more comfortable writing that way. I hope you guys don't mind. You could also say that all the previous chapters were just memories anyways, so it sort of makes sense? :)
> 
> Anyways, this is a late gift for Catra's birthday! I had no power almost all week so that's why it's late. 
> 
> Enjoy!

A kaleidoscope of precious moments. Catra’s grateful for them, that they weren’t wiped from existence. She’s grateful they’re still here.

Adora is safe in Catra’s arms, and for the moment that is all that matters to her. All is calm now, though Etheria is still bustling, healing itself. They’re sitting in front of the fireplace: Catra, Adora, Bow, and Glimmer. They aren’t alone, but they may as well be. Everyone is sort of still in a daze, tending to their own wounds and to each other’s; they’re all staring into the abyss, not unhappily, but still largely in disbelief with the resounding shock of: _We’re still here. This is real._

Not everyone has returned to Bright Moon. Melog had run off shortly after the magic was released, though Catra isn’t worried. No doubt the Whispering Woods feels like home to them, now that its magical essence has been replenished. They’ll return to her when they’re ready.

Spinnerella and Netossa are here, cuddled up on one of the couches, ignoring everyone except each other. But sometimes they leave for a time; like some of the others, they journey down to the makeshift medical center constructed in their previous hideout in shifts to check on those who were chipped or otherwise wounded in the battle. Entrapta is there, as are Castaspella and Micah, and Catra is grateful she doesn’t have to face him just yet. She suspects he’s gracious and kind, like Glimmer, but the weight of the harm Catra’s caused their family is not lost on her.

Scorpia is there, too, undergoing only a few evaluations. She’s always been strong. Catra would like to apologize to her more in depth, but that will have to wait for another time.

Catra glances over to Perfuma and Frosta, who huddle together under Swift Wind’s wing. The three of them are building flower crowns it looks like, no doubt to distract Frosta from everything going on. She’d been especially worried about Scorpia and Micah, though she’d already made the journey to check on them herself.

“We can take the sleeping bags down there,” Catra hears Bow murmur to Glimmer, the two of them wrapped securely in each other’s arms. They’ve been like this for hours. “I really don’t mind. You need to be with your dad.”

“I’m still queen. I’m sure my dad would want me to keep an eye on things here,” she argues, and Bow kisses her forehead.

“Your dad would want you to go where your heart tells you to go.”

“I’m trying to convince myself that there’s time,” she says, sounding more mature than Catra’s ever heard from her. “There will be time for proper reunions later. Bright Moon needs its queen. And what about you? What about Lance and George? I can teleport you if you need to be with them,” she says, rubbing the arm that’s wrapped around her.

“Tomorrow,” Bow decides after some thought. “We can check on them tomorrow. But right now, I don’t want to leave you alone,” he says, tucking closer to her. Catra considers making a vomiting sound, but she’d be a hypocrite to do so. She and Adora have barely spoken for the past several hours. Instead, they’ve simply clung to each other, just enjoying the simple pleasure of having each other near, and it reminds her so much of those early days when they were younger. She resists the urge to knead Adora’s back like she would have back then, and instead rubs a hand soothingly up and down, feeling the bumps of Adora’s spine through her jacket. Adora shivers and nuzzles closer, lips barely brushing Catra’s neck.

“I…I’m glad you guys are okay,” Catra murmurs, feeling as though she’s disrupting something personal by breaking the silence. “Really.” She swallows, but when she glances up she’s met with grateful smiles from both of them. She feels one of Adora’s hands clutch at her shirt. It’s still so overwhelming to know that they made it. They’re still here.

“You too, Horde Scum,” Glimmer says softly.

“Honestly, I’m still processing everything,” Bow chuckles in disbelief. “I’m just…so relieved. Relieved you found Adora – that you were there with her through it all.” Catra meets his gaze, which is usually rather difficult for her; Bow has this way of seeing through her, expression always so raw and open. It usually makes her uncomfortable, but her own feelings of gratitude overshadow any awkwardness. “I’m glad you two made it out. Even if…not everyone else did,” he adds, not saying her name. Another thing to be grateful for, because even if that’s a conversation Catra will need to have with Adora later, it’s most definitely not one she wants to have now. If Adora’s silence is anything to go by, she feels the same.

“Where else would I be?” she chooses to answer instead, looking tenderly down at Adora. She feels her smile on her skin, and then Adora’s pulling away, looking up so Catra can see the smile – sweet and the tiniest bit smug and completely Adora.

Catra feels distraught when it slips off her face with some sort of realization, and then Adora is sitting up and Catra mourns her warmth.

“I need to apologize,” Adora says, turning to Bow and Glimmer. “For leaving – I’m _so_ sorry. I’m so sorry I ran off to deal with the Heart alone. I’m sorry if I worried you.” Catra rubs Adora’s back as she begins to choke up. She understands that regret. She left Adora, too, after all. She has her own apologies to make. Plenty of them. 

“We were worried,” Glimmer says, leaning over to grab Adora’s hand. “But we aren’t angry, Adora. You were in a difficult position and…we all had our own battles to fight,” she says, glancing up at Bow who nods in agreement.

“The important thing is that The Best Friends Squad is together again and stronger than ever,” Bow smiles, and Catra notices the way he leans forward to follow Glimmer, attracted to her warmth now, to her very presence. Catra understands the feeling.

She’s about to settle herself against Adora again, content to fall asleep with her next to the flickering firelight, when the other girl stretches and yawns so big that Catra can hear her jaw pop.

“Sounds like Miss Savior of the Universe needs a nap,” Glimmer jokes, and Adora responds with a dopey smile.

“It’s been a day,” she says, shivering and blinking sleepily. “That’s for sure. I think I’m gonna head up to my room…dust off some of the cobwebs,” Adora declares, standing and leaving Catra feeling rather bereft. She frowns, but tries not to pout too much, lest the others think she’s gone soft.

Oh, who is she kidding? She _has_ gone soft.

She’s a bit startled when Adora kicks her, rather playfully considering how vulnerable they’ve been acting around each other up until now.

“Wanna head to bed?” Adora smiles, clearly blushing but otherwise confident as she extends a hand down to Catra.

“Oh crap,” Glimmer says through a yawn. “I’m sorry, Catra. I didn’t even think about preparing you a room. I can – ,”

“There’s no need, Glimmer,” Adora says, taking Catra’s hand in hers. “She can sleep in my room.”

They’d slept together almost every night on Darla, but for some reason the proposal still makes Catra shiver with anticipation. Maybe its because their relationship is no longer just flirty banter and spontaneous signs of mutual affection or attraction. The impossible has happened. Adora loves her.

“You sure?” Glimmer asks, but the knowing smirk on her face says she doesn’t need an answer. Honestly, Catra and Adora haven’t exactly been subtle about their fraternization for awhile now. Her younger self would laugh at this sentiment, but Bow and Glimmer aren’t stupid.

“Yeah,” Adora says, smiling at Catra. Catra realizes then that she’s waiting for confirmation, not that she actually needs it. Nodding stupidly, Catra squeezes Adora’s hand and lets her lead the way. “Love you guys. We’ll see you in the morning.”

“Love you, too!” Glimmer says.

“Sweet dreams,” Bow calls behind them, and Catra forces herself to ignore their soft giggling.

\- - -

Adora’s room is ridiculously lavish, even compared to the other parts of Bright Moon that Catra has had the privilege of seeing thus far. It’s also a bit cold and empty all things considered, definitely too spacious for one person. Catra sees now why Adora was so dependent on Bow and Glimmer when she first got here, and why she felt the urge to sneak into Glimmer’s bed that first night (a fun-fact that Glimmer had shared with Catra during one of their private talks).

However, Catra is also incredibly distracted by one small observation: She’s _alone_ with Adora.

Adora pays no mind to the way Catra just stands there like an idiot, holding one arm as she glances around the expanse of the room, trying to ignore her racing heartbeat at this most recent revelation.

“So…uh…this is it!” Adora stammers with forced pep, sweeping a thick layer of dust off the top of a desk. “You’ve got your balcony, vanity, _lots_ of crystals, and a waterfall. It’s…uh, not for showering, though,” she says, looking strangely embarrassed for some reason. “That’s what the…what the bathtub over there is for,” she nods to a completely exposed bathtub. Honestly, Catra feels exposed enough and she doesn’t exactly feel the urge to dunk herself in a bowl of water just yet. She glances warily at the waterfall.

“Okay, but… _could_ the waterfall be used for showering?” she asks, eyes narrowing contemplatively.

“You’ll have to risk the wrath of Glimmer,” Adora shrugs, smiling.

“Ha! I can handle Sparkles no problem. Plus, if I’m sharing a room with She-Ra, I doubt I have anything to worry about.”

They share another quick smile, but then they’re looking away from each other again and Catra hates it. Adora startles whistling and Catra’s blushing, and it’s so awkward and new and there’s so much to say. Catra doesn’t exactly know where to begin, but go figure that they were all over each other around company but can barely stand to look at each other now that they’re alone.

“So, uh…sleep!” Adora exclaims, startling Catra as she rushes over to a wardrobe. “Right; can’t wear these clothes to bed.”

“Better shake out the spiders,” Catra remarks as Adora tosses her a tank top and shorts over her shoulder.

“Oh, don’t worry! I am,” Adora laughs and Catra follows suit.

They dress quickly and slide into Adora’s very small bed together. At first Catra tries to curl up just below Adora’s feet like she used to, but Adora shakes her head and pats the pillow next to her.

“Nothing’s changed, Catra. Up here,” she smiles, then winces at her phrasing.

They both know – _everything’s_ changed.

Catra scoots in beside Adora. It’s tight – like, _super_ tight. Catra swallows and meets Adora’s eyes; her expression is fond, loving even, but equally nervous.

“So…um…,” Adora yawns, “long day, huh?”

“Yeah…pretty exhausting.”

“Saving the universe, huh?”

“Yep.”

“We should probably get some sleep.”

“Couldn’t agree more.”

There’s a long pause where they blink at each other, and then Catra rolls over with a groan, nearly falling off the edge of the bed. She places a hand over her face as she laughs, peeking through her fingers at Adora, whose eyes are brimming with amusement.

“So, do we... _pffft_...should we talk about it?”

“Okay, I was literally just waiting for you to say something,” Adora laughs.

“What, _me_?” Catra feigns outrage. “Nu uh. I said everything at the heart. It’s your turn.”

“What, like I’m suddenly awesome with words or something now?” Adora protests, though it’s still all in good fun. Catra bites her lip to suppress her snickers as Adora becomes increasingly flustered. “I mean, you love me and that’s…that’s just… _wow_ …and I’ve loved you since, like, _forever_ , and now I just feel like a complete idiot because all this time we were dancing around the issue, and then we kissed, and I…I never thought…”

Adora trails off, looks to Catra for help. Catra knows her expression is openly fond, and this seems to calm Adora. She scoots closer, if that’s even possible, so that their foreheads touch.

“I’ve wanted this for so long,” she whispers, closing her eyes. “I just never thought I’d be allowed to have it.”

“Funny,” Catra remarks, trying to sound casual even though she can hear her own voice cracking. “I never thought I deserved to have it.”

Adora’s eyes open, slowly, and there’s a sadness reflected there that makes Catra regret the words.

“We’ve been through this, Catra. We all have to live with our mistakes, but that doesn’t mean we have to live with them alone.”

Catra closes her eyes with a sharp breath, attempts to hide the moisture there. But Adora knows. She cups Catra’s left cheek, pulls it gently so that it no longer rests on the pillow, and then she leans forward and kisses it. Adora lets her lips linger on that spot, and Catra understands. The tears fall freely.

“Don’t hide from me,” Adora says, a single sniffle giving her away. She leans up to plant another kiss on Catra’s forehead. “It’s okay to cry.”

“I’m not crying, you’re crying,” Catra shoots back, but she opens her eyes. Adora is laughing again, full of emotion and adoration, and it’s such a precious thing that Catra, several weeks back, never thought she would see again.

Adora sniffles again and they stare into each other’s eyes, filled with so much relief and the exciting promise of a future together. This is actually happening, Catra reminds herself. They’re _safe_. 

"I'm sorry I left you back there," Catra says, sobering slightly. She squeezes her eyes shut as the tears keep coming. "I thought I was going to lose you again, and I couldn't handle it. But I shouldn't have...shouldn't have run away." 

"I understand why you did," Adora smiles sadly. "Seeing you leave hurt...but it made me realize things, I think. And besides," Adora strokes her thumb along Catra's jaw, and Catra leans into the touch, "you came back. You saved me."

Catra's eyes widen at this statement, and her breath catches. She glances away shyly, suddenly unable to properly form words. 

"I-I didn't..."

"You did," Adora affirms, breathing finally even. Catra wishes she could say the same. “I love you so much,” Adora says then, and Catra’s heart skips a beat at hearing those words again. “You’re my best friend and my…my whole heart. Don’t laugh, you dork,” Adora kicks Catra under the sheets, and Catra forces herself to stop laughing. She can’t help it. Her heart feels like it’s floating. She’s just so giddy and so in love and it’s so stupid and so wonderful. “I just…I don’t want to lose you. Not ever,” Adora finishes.

“You won’t,” Catra soothes her, finding her words. Cupping her face, Catra pulls Adora into a deep kiss. Their lips move against each other for several blissful moments, and it’s a relief that they don’t have to rush this time. They take their time, coming apart to breathe before Adora eagerly pulls Catra back in. Adora snorts against her lips as Catra starts purring, and Catra’s tail twines around Adora’s leg, as if they could get any closer than they already are. Eventually they do part, though Catra is already hungry for more. She licks her lips and glances down at Adora’s parted lips. “I’ll always be your Catra,” she vows.

“Promise?”

“I promise.” And they seal it with another long kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short, sweet, and to the point!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading. I truly enjoyed writing this story, and I hope you all are satisfied with the final chapter. Now that I've finished, I can finally move onto other projects with a clear conscience. :D
> 
> All my love and best wishes!


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